My friends …
Last Tuesday morning, the California sun was shining, as those of us who were already at Lynn’s house (Lynn, Gillian, Jim, and I) set the breakfast table ready for those who were yet to arrive. Then, a bunch of lovely ladies came down the pathway to knock on Lynn’s door. We stood to meet them, hugged, and cried.
Tears welled up in their eyes and in ours. “Sorry, this is overwhelming,” one of them said.
Somewhere along the way, one of the lady’s husbands mingled in amongst it all at the door. He had dropped his wife off. He received a hug too, then left. "I'll leave you to do your thing," he said to her behind the scenes. "You enjoy yourself."
It takes a while to get to that point in a spiritually mismatched marriage!
The thing that struck me the most in the whole day was the tears. The tears came on arrival and welled up on and off throughout the day.
Why so many tears? Well, isn’t it such a deep path, this SUM thing? It’s a narrow path, and one that not many share with us. It’s a deeply felt experience, with deeply spiritual challenges. I’m using the word ‘deep’ a lot. But that’s what it is: Deep.
Deeply felt. Deeply experienced. Deeply spiritual, because marriage is spiritual.
You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. (Psalm 56:8, NLT)
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance (Eccl 3:1-4, KJV)
As I said in the talk I gave that morning (which you can watch here if you missed it), we won’t always cry, but there is a season in our SUM life where we do. And the relief of being with others in the same boat when we're in that season of tears is immense.
In the afternoon, having breakfasted and lunched together, we took some time to listen to each other’s testimonies in turn. More tears flowed as we listened to each other’s stories. And from those stories was depth and growth.
Depth in how we navigate all the different challenges that come with a SUM. Growth as we develop our character and wisdom.
One woman shared how her husband has begun unexpectedly reading the Bible. She came into the room one day to see him with it open. “I would be shocked if that happened to me!” I said. “I WAS!” she answered.
Another lady shared how her daughter and husband had given their lives to Christ after a very, very difficult and heartbreaking journey of impossible unbelief.
Another shared how her strength had grown exponentially within a difficult marriage.
And so on. And so on. And so on.
We were twelve God-loving souls together for the day. Beautiful.
Karen, Lynn, Sarah, Jim, Gillian, Cat, Christine, Alyson, Lucie, Janet, and Laurie – Thanks for sharing a great day.
I have a few more stories to share yet, so stay tuned!
Much love,
Ann
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