Well it’s been a long time since I have posted an update about the Donovans. This post is difficult for me to write.
Most of you know that in January my husband lost his job. Back then I wrote about my trust in God and how He has our lives in the palm of His hand. I wrote how I knew He was working all things together for good and for my husband’s salvation because I love Him. You can read that post here.
Friday my husband sat me down on the couch, “Honey, I just spoke with the company. They are unable to hire me as we were anticipating. The company decided to hire from within to save money. In fact, things now are again at square zero. I will keep looking”
Literally, my heart began to pound. In 15 seconds a million thoughts flashed through my mind.
- The dwindling number in our checkbook.
- The doctor’s appointment that must be postponed.
- A long overdue purchase of bathroom rugs.
- Big things and tiny things.
- As well as the small but still relevant wish list I cling to for the day a paycheck once again arrives in hand.
Girls and guys, it is now I find out what my faith is really made of. Today, this month, it seems my hope and enthusiasm is eroding. I just didn’t see this setback commin’. Blindsided and befuddled.
For the past three years I have written about God’s faithfulness in my life. I have shared with you tiny as well as giant miracles of God moving in the most unexpected ways in my life. I have assured you the Lord hears our prayers and waits anxiously to answer.
Today I am standing in that deep valley. I have questions.
- Lord, why are you silent?
- Lord, do you want ME to return to work?
- Lord, how much longer do we wait?
- Lord, why aren’t you listening?
Gulp….. And then…….. I went to church. Thank you Jesus for church. Although church is filled up with broken and messed up people (like me), it is a place where Jesus dwells and gives me perspective.
The message today: When Life Doesn’t Make Sense. Do you think this message was for an audience of one????
For the first time in a long time, God seems to be silent. Aren’t there scripture verses where God pulls away to test a person. Hummmmm. God is silent. My life is on hold. I am not hearing the Lord speak the way forward. How many of you have been in this place?
However, my life is not God forsaken it is God directed. It is time to really show all of you what my faith is made of. It is time for me to put my faith where my mouth is or at least my computer keys….
For years I have asked you to cling to Jesus to trust Him with your heart and your marriage. So, today, I am compelled to believe Jesus is asking me to cling to Him in the silence and trust Him with our future. This is what I heard this morning as if it was written for me alone:
“Lynn, for the next 24 hours I want you to do what you know is right (Godly). I want you to trust me so much that you must lean on me each day and only focus on one day at a time. Then…… I promise you this, the day will come and you will be amazed to see how I have used you in a powerful way.”
As I heard these words I wept.
Gang, I will choose this day, these 24 hours, to remain faithful. I will choose to do what is right. I will continue on doing what the Lord told me to do the last time He spoke.
If you are traveling in this strange valley with me, and I know many of you are, keep doing the last thing you were told. Choose to do the right thing. Focus on what you have always known to be true. The truth of the living Word of God. Live these next 24 hours leaning wholly on the arms of Christ and I am certain with all that I am that we will be amazed to see how God has used our life our witness in a powerful way.
Thank you so much every one of you who has prayed for my husband and me. Your emails checking in on us, your e-cards, your friendship has carried me through this valley. I will promise you this. This trip through the valley will never be forgotten. When I hear of a sister or a brother in the valley in the future, you can bet, I will be your prayer partner. I will pray with a new fervor because now I have lived it.
I love you. Be blessed, Lynn

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